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Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Just came from lunch not long ago. Went over to Kwong Soon's canteen. The food there is so expensive. Some times I feel that the prices are not fixed. Which means they charge different races differently. We can order the same kind of food yet paying much more than the race in front of us. WTF?! But nvm laa.. forget it. We got to eat anyway. Right after lunch I came back to my seat without taking a walk outside with Hubby. Hubby headed for a smoke then suddenly came in to find me. He played computer games with me and cannot stop 'sniffing' me. Lols. After games, he went back to his department.

I have just entered my 8th month of pregnancy. Things aren't so smooth. I feel so tired and breathless all the time. My tummy feels so heavy and I feel difficulties when walking. I feel pain in my pelvis when I walk and my baby pressing against me. I feel so heaty and humid. And my bladder seems full all the time! These aren't the worsts, but I must say they affected my mood. My smiles became lesser. I feel so moody all the time. These few days was just work-home-Tv-sleep. Lesser words from me too. I didn't talk as much to Hubby, Ivan nor Mummy. Lesser time spent with Pepper also. I dunoe why but I don't have the mood to joke or chatter. I guess Hubby must have realised my mood swings, so he came in to play games with me. Thanks, I am aware of your gestures. But I really have no mood. Whole day only facing the computer, if not the Tv. I feel like a robot. I hope to rest at home, but I cannot. I need to work. I feel so tired you know! I already turn in early everyday, yet I'm so lethargic every morning. My appetite ceased and I feel so fat every time I look in the mirror. I look like one FAT sow. My thighs and calfs are fo fcuking huge and fat. Everyone is saying I'm too fat. I feel hurt! I even got sick of the computer games I play everyday. I have lost alot of things, I feel really upset. I really feel so moody!!

I know Hubby is trying to cheer me up by talking to me more. Giving in to me when deciding the place for dinner. Playing with baby in my tummy more. Uploading games into PSP for me to play. Joke about cowboys, talk about where to shop for CNY, accompanying me watch dramas and even smoking lesser and further. I know he's trying..yet I gave him cold shoulders and a super farking face. Even when he sniffs me like a dog or tickles me, I didn't smile nor giggle. I just gave him a disgusted and 'pek chek' look. I don't know what's with me. I obviously know my husband is trying to ease my mood swings, yet I find faults with him and feel angry at him. When he missed my sms, I grew pissed off and hated him so much although I knew he's busy drawing. I used to be understanding. I know he's busy, yet I'm blaming him for everything. What happened to me?! I'm torturing the people who loves me. I feel like an idiot!!


his wifey; her mummy <3
1:50 PM